"Rei" of Hope

To the constant and ever-flaming bright "rei" of hope in my life,

Happy second birthday!!  :)

A Rhetorical Question

Having worked previously in the Intensive Care Unit for almost 3 years, I am no stranger to something that many people view as taboo..

Death

We would break the bad news to a couple of our patients' grief-stricken families on a daily basis, to the extent that sometimes, especially after a harrowing 32 -hour on -call, death, God forbid, became almost a matter-of-fact... Yes, it was as if my conscience and compassion had suffered a massive stroke, and I had become paralysed and devoid of the ability to Empathise.... This was, one of the main reasons why I left critical care... I needed a clinical rehabilitation, to remind myself again the immense privilege that is to being someone's doctor.

Today, one of my patients looked me in the eye, and as she struggled to catch her breath, asked me outright:

" Doctor, am I dying?"

This is the first time in my medical career that someone asked me this question. Well, most of my previous critical patients were either comatosed or had a breathing tube in their mouth, so they couldn't have asked me this question even if they had wanted to.

"Is this how it all ends?"

I could hear the wheels in my brain engaging rapidly in full gear. How, how should I respond to this? Should I tell her that she is indeed dying and all her suffering will pass from here on, or should I continue to give her hope so that her inevitable journey to death will be less dreadful?

I steadied my humbled self and took her hands in mine..As I brushed the beads of sweat off her forehead, I gently alluded to the fact that the inevitable is indeed drawing near, but I would ensure the journey would be well supported, comfortable and most importantly, dignified...

I realise that in our current medical culture, we are, most of the time, pre-occupied with treatment and cure, that we sometimes overlook the fact that the journey of dying, is also as important, both to the patient and also to their loved ones... what can be more comforting for the carers than seeing their dying loved ones go in peace, and at least, with dignity?

She mustered her strength and gave me a smile, but very soon after, lapsed into a peaceful state of subconsciousness.... 

The above image was downloaded from www.glatfelterhealthcarepractice.com